True Love: A Catholic Understanding

what is true love catholic answers

Love is a broad term that means different things to different people. The ancient Greeks distinguished between eros, or romantic love, and agape, a love that is freely chosen and given without expectation of gain. According to the Catholic Church, true love is a divine virtue, a gift from God, and the very nature of God himself. It is a love that is given freely and without expectation of reciprocation, and it is this love that God has for us. Jesus Christ, in turn, commands his followers to love one another, and to love God above all else. This is reflected in the Catechism of the Catholic Church, which teaches about human love and sexuality, and the importance of chastity in integrating sexuality within the person.

Characteristics Values
Type of love Eros, Agape, Philia
Who it involves God, Jesus, Man, Neighbour, Enemy, Stranger
What it means To give rather than receive, to give in deeds, to give self
What it is not To receive, to give only in words or affections, to give things
What it transforms Eros
What it is ordered to The Sacrament of Matrimony
What it is infused with Sanctifying grace

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Love is giving, not receiving

In the Catholic faith, the concept of love is deeply rooted in the teachings of Jesus Christ and the Scripture. At its core, true love in Catholicism embodies self-giving rather than receiving, extending beyond words and affections to encompass deeds and the giving of oneself. This notion aligns with the ancient Greek concept of "agape," a love that is freely chosen and directed towards the good of another.

The idea of "eros," or erotic love, also plays a role in the Catholic understanding of love. Eros, as described by the ancient Greeks, is a powerful and overwhelming force that draws individuals towards each other. However, in Catholicism, eros is not merely about romantic or physical desire; it is seen as a gateway to a deeper form of love, illuminating the true meaning of agape. Eros, when understood and directed towards the divine, can lead to a profound comprehension of God's passionate love for humanity.

According to Catholic teachings, true love is a reflection of God's love for mankind. God, being love itself, created all people in His image, male and female, to share and reflect His love in the world. This belief is central to the Catholic understanding of human love and sexuality, emphasizing the sacredness of marriage and procreation as a gift from God. Chastity, as a virtue, plays a crucial role in integrating sexuality and safeguarding love from the pitfalls of selfishness.

Love, as a theological virtue, is often referred to as "charity" in Catholicism. It is defined as a Divinely infused habit, inclining the human will to cherish God above all and to love others for the sake of God. This form of love transcends personal satisfaction and extends to the well-being of others, even those we may not naturally feel affection for.

The commandment to "love your neighbor as yourself" is a central tenet of Christian love. This love is not limited to those within our immediate circles but extends to all humanity, regardless of differences or even enmity. It is a love that seeks the good of another, mirroring the love that God has for each person.

In summary, the Catholic understanding of true love is deeply rooted in the belief that love is giving, not receiving. It is a self-sacrificial love that mirrors the love of God, extending beyond words and emotions to manifest in actions and the giving of oneself for the benefit of others.

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Agape vs. Eros

In the Catholic religion, the character of God is represented by the syncretism of 'eros' with 'agape', which is referred to as 'charity' or 'lovingkindness'. Eros and Agape are two ancient Greek words for love. Eros refers to a passionate love for union. It is not merely sexual but at its deepest level, it is a love for truth, beauty and goodness. It is also described as a love for God or another human being out of self-interest. Agape, on the other hand, is a self-giving and self-sacrificial kind of love. It is based on God's unconditional love for all creatures.

Traditional Catholic teaching distinguishes between "natural" love and "supernatural" love, with the latter being considered superior. Eros is the former, and Agape is the latter. Eros played an important role in pagan literature, such as in Plato's Symposium. It is also the type of love that can exist between a man and a woman. Agape, on the other hand, is the distinctly Christian love of neighbour. It is limited to the love of God and one's neighbour.

Some believe that eros and agape are not opposed to each other but rather complement each other. Pope Benedict XVI, for instance, argues that eros and agape are not distinct kinds of love but are separate halves of complete love, unified as both a giving and receiving. He further explains that in agape, one gives of oneself to another, while in eros, the self seeks to receive from another self. However, eros needs to be disciplined and purified if it is to provide not just fleeting pleasure but a foretaste of the pinnacle of our existence.

The secular world often separates eros and agape, but Christ wants to bring them together. For instance, in some misguided Christian marriages, there is agape without eros, or erotic, sexual love without self-gift, which can lead to divorce and broken families. Thus, eros and agape should not be seen as an either/or but rather as a both/and.

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Love as a virtue

Love is a complex concept that has been explored and defined in various ways throughout history. According to Catholic teachings, love is a virtue that holds significant importance in both our relationships with others and our relationship with God. In this context, it is essential to understand the different types of love and how they shape our understanding of true love from a Catholic perspective.

Firstly, eros, as defined by the ancient Greeks, refers to a powerful and overwhelming form of love that arises without conscious thought or intention. It is often associated with romantic love and the desire to become one with another person. While eros is acknowledged in Catholic teachings, it is not the primary focus when discussing authentic Christian love.

Agape, on the other hand, is a type of love that is freely chosen and extends beyond oneself for the good of others. This concept is central to Christian love, as exemplified by Mother Teresa's dedication to serving the needy through her Missionaries of Charity. Agape love is about giving rather than receiving and is rooted in our relationship with God.

Christian love, or agape, is a virtue that calls us to love others regardless of our feelings or their actions. This type of love transcends personal satisfaction and is expressed through deeds, not just words or affections. It is a love that mirrors God's love for us and is reflected in Jesus' commandment to "love your enemies" (Luke 6:27) and to "love your neighbor as yourself" (Matthew 22:39).

The Catechism of the Catholic Church emphasizes the importance of chastity as a virtue that protects the inner unity of the person, encompassing body, mind, and soul. It enables individuals to defend love from the pitfalls of selfishness and aggressiveness, fostering true freedom and peace.

In conclusion, true love in the Catholic faith is a virtue that encompasses agape love for God and neighbor, as well as the integration of chastity as a protective virtue. It is a love that gives selflessly, reflects God's image, and is expressed through actions that benefit others. By understanding the distinction between eros and agape, Catholics strive to live out their faith with authentic Christian love, mirroring the love that God has for all creation.

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Love and sexuality

The Catholic Church affirms a positive view of sex and love, seeing them as gifts from God. Sexuality is not something that exists with a purely biological purpose defined by personal preference. Instead, it is an integral part of the human person, woven into the fabric of each man and woman. It is a gift from God that carries within it the powers of love and life and is the human source of our most basic relationships as members of a family.

The Church teaches that sexual intercourse has a twofold unitive and procreative purpose. It is considered chaste only within the context of marriage, where it is an act of love between two married persons. This is because the marriage bond is seen as a sign of the love between God and humanity. The Catechism of the Catholic Church states that "sexuality is a source of joy and pleasure." It also emphasizes that sexual relationships are not to be treated as a form of entertainment or an itch to casually scratch. Instead, sexuality is viewed within the context of human and divine relationships, reflecting God's image in the world.

The Church defines chastity as the virtue that moderates the sexual appetite, calling everyone to practice it. Unmarried Catholics express chastity through sexual abstinence, while sexual intercourse within marriage is considered chaste when it retains the twofold significance of union and procreation.

According to the ancient Greeks, there are two aspects of love: Eros and Agape. Eros is the overwhelming love that happens without conscious thought or will, while Agape is the love we freely choose to extend to others for their good. In the Christian context, Agape is the love that Christians are called to express above all else, reflecting God's love for humanity.

True love, as understood by Catholics, is about giving rather than receiving. It involves self-giving and extending love to others regardless of our feelings, even to those we may consider enemies. This love is not limited to romantic relationships but encompasses a range of human connections, including families, friendships, colleagues, and the global community.

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Love in the Bible

The Bible contains many references to love, and it is a central theme in both the Old and New Testaments. The Christian faith is founded on the belief that "God is love" (1 John 4:16). This love is revealed to humanity through Jesus Christ, who is described as the embodiment of God's love (1 John 4:9).

In the Bible, love is not just a feeling but a choice—an action that one consciously decides to take. This idea is perhaps best summed up by St. Thomas Aquinas, who said, "Amare est velle alicui bonum"—"To love is to will the good for another." This type of love, often referred to as "agape," is a selfless love that seeks the highest good for the other person. It is a love that God has for humanity and that Christians are called to reflect in their relationships with God and with others.

Jesus himself summarised this dual aspect of love in two commandments: "You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart, and with all your soul, and with all your mind... [and] you shall love your neighbour as yourself" (Matthew 22:36-39). This second commandment, to love one's neighbour, is a recurring theme in the Bible and is often referred to as "love of neighbour" or "brotherly love." It is a love that transcends natural affection or solidarity, extending even to strangers, social outcasts, and enemies (Leviticus 19:34, Luke 10:33, Matthew 5:23).

The Bible also recognises another form of love, "eros," which is a more passionate, romantic love. This type of love is not condemned in Christianity but is rather seen as a gift from God that can lead to a deeper understanding of God's love. Sacred Scripture often uses marital images and erotic love as metaphors to describe God's relationship with humanity, as in the book of Hosea: "I will espouse you to me forever. I will espouse you in fidelity, and you shall know the Lord" (Hosea 2:19-20).

Finally, the Bible also speaks of self-love, not in a selfish or narcissistic sense, but in the sense of loving oneself as God's creation. This is reflected in the commandment to "love your neighbour as yourself" (Matthew 22:39), implying that loving oneself is part of God's design.

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Frequently asked questions

According to the Catholic Church, true love means to give rather than to receive. It means to give in deeds and not only in affections or words, and to give oneself and not just material things. True love is also about understanding the difference between good and bad and sharing that knowledge with others for their benefit.

There are at least three types of love according to the Catholic Church: eros, philia, and agape. Eros is the love that arises without thinking or willing it, like the love Romeo feels for Juliet at first sight. Agape, on the other hand, is the love we choose to give freely, like Mother Teresa's love for the poor. Philia is a type of brotherly love, as mentioned in the Bible verse, "Love your neighbor as yourself."

The Bible describes marriage as a sacred institution created by God to realize His design of love. It views procreation as a "primary good" of marriage, seeing it as an awe-inspiring act of God's generosity. Chastity is also considered essential to love rightly, as it protects the inner unity of body, mind, and soul, and enables individuals to defend love from selfishness and aggressiveness.

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