Sarah Mitchell
The expression Is the Pope Catholic? is a rhetorical question used in response to a query that the respondent wishes to answer with a strong affirmative. The joke relies on the fact that the Pope's Catholicism is beyond doubt, and so the questioner is sarcastically alluding to the obviousness of the answer to the original query. The joke has been around for a while, with the earliest citation found in a New Jersey newspaper in 1959.
| Characteristics | Values |
|---|---|
| Structure | Question and answer format |
| Question | Is the Pope Catholic? |
| Answer | Yes, or a variation such as "Does a bear shit in the woods?" |
| Variations | "Does the Pope shit in the woods?"; "Is a bear Catholic?";; "Is a frog's ass watertight?" |
| Joke Type | Silly, absurd, or ironic |
| Context | Often used to respond to a "stupid" or obvious question |
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What You'll Learn
Pope and purgatory
There was an administrative mix-up in purgatory, and the Pope was sent to Hell and Clinton to Heaven. After 20 minutes, the mistake was rectified. As they headed down the escalator, Clinton going down and the Pope going up, the Pope said to Clinton, "I'm really looking forward to meeting all the famous people down there."
A Protestant dies and, being a Protestant, naturally goes straight to Hell. The Devil escorts him to the River Styx, where all the other departed Protestants stand waist-deep in sewage, mud, and excrement. The Devil instructs him to stand there until the end of time and think about the terrible sin he committed by not being Catholic.
After his passing, Pope Francis arrived at the Pearly Gates. God himself picked him up and guided him to his very own cloud. God then left him. Francis has his own harp and now uses his time to praise the Lord. After some hours, God showed up again carrying a silver tray with a yoghurt and a spoon. This repeated for some days.
A Catholic kid says, "I got detention in purgatory!"
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Pope and the Lord's Prayer
The Pope and the Lord's Prayer is a topic that has inspired a variety of jokes, often playing on the idea of changing the traditional wording of the prayer. Here are four to six paragraphs on this theme:
KFC's Proposal
A man working for KFC goes to see the Pope and offers him ten million dollars to change the line "Give us this day our daily bread" in the Lord's Prayer to "Give us this day our daily chicken." The Pope is shocked and refuses. This joke plays on the idea of large corporations trying to influence even the most sacred of institutions with their money and the idea of product placement in religion.
Starbucks' Offer
In a similar vein, a joke has it that Starbucks arranged a meeting with the Pope at the Vatican and offered him a $100 million donation to the Church if he would change the Lord's Prayer from "give us this day..." to "give us this latte...". This joke also comments on corporate influence and the commercialisation of religion, with a playful twist on the sacred words of the prayer.
A Billion-Dollar Donation
Another joke tells of a CEO who offers the Catholic Church a $1 billion donation on the condition that the Lord's Prayer is changed from "give us this day our daily bread" to "give us this day our daily chicken." This joke also pokes fun at the idea of corporations trying to buy influence, with a focus on the immense wealth and power of CEOs.
Holy Humour
These jokes about the Lord's Prayer and the Pope highlight the power of humour to bring people together, as Pope Francis himself has acknowledged. He has even shared a prayer attributed to St. Thomas More, which he says he prays every day: "Grant me, O Lord, a good sense of humour." This shows that while the jokes may be light-hearted, they also touch on a deeper appreciation for the role of laughter in faith and community.
A Matter of Faith
While these jokes may be amusing, they also highlight the tension between commercial interests and religious traditions. The Lord's Prayer is a sacred text for Christians, and the idea of changing its wording for financial gain is absurd and sacrilegious. This tension creates a humorous effect, inviting us to laugh at the absurdity of the situation while also reflecting on the value of faith and the power of prayer.
Finally, the question "Is the Pope Catholic?" has become a well-known joke or riddle, often paired with the question "Do bears defecate in the woods?". The joke lies in the obvious answer ("yes") and the playful reversal of the expected question "Is a bear Catholic?". This joke has endured due to its simplicity and the unexpected twist it presents, showing that humour can often be found in the most obvious or absurd places.
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Pope and a tourist
A Japanese tourist is visiting the Vatican and is taking photos of the beautiful architecture. Suddenly, he sees the Pope walking towards him. Excited to see the Pope in person, the tourist quickly snaps a few photos. The Pope walks over and says, "That's a nice camera you have there. Would you consider selling it to me?" Flustered, the tourist replies, "Oh, Your Holiness, I am so sorry! I didn't realize it was you. Of course, I will sell you my camera!" The Pope thanks him and takes the camera, but before he walks away, he asks the tourist, "How much do I owe you?" The tourist, surprised by the Pope's generosity, replies, "It's on the house, Your Holiness!"
The next day, the tourist is walking through St. Peter's Square when he sees the Pope approaching him, carrying a small package. "Ah, my friend," the Pope says, "I have something for you." He hands the tourist the package, which contains a brand new camera, even better than the one the tourist had given him. "I hope you enjoy this," the Pope says with a smile. "It's the least I could do after your generous gift." The tourist is overwhelmed by the Pope's kindness and thanks him profusely.
As the Pope turns to leave, the tourist asks, "Your Holiness, I have one request. Could I possibly get your autograph?" The Pope kindly agrees and signs a piece of paper that the tourist tears from his notebook. The Pope then blesses the tourist and continues on his way. The tourist, curious about the amount, looks at the autograph and sees that the Pope has signed it with the name "Canon."
The tourist then visits a local café, where he meets a priest. He tells the priest about his encounter with the Pope and how he received a new camera as a gift. "That's wonderful," the priest says. "But tell me, what kind of camera was it?" The tourist replies, "I don't know, but the Pope's picture is already in it!"
The joke plays on the tourist's misunderstanding of the Pope's words and actions, with a humorous twist at the end involving a play on words with the camera brand, Canon.
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Pope and a chauffeur
The Pope and his chauffeur
A man gets a job as a high-profile chauffeur and his first assignment is to pick up the Pope from the airport. As they're driving, the Pope initiates a conversation:
"You know, they never let me drive myself back at the Vatican."
The chauffeur, curious, asks, "Do you know how to drive, Your Holiness?"
"Well, I learned when I was a young boy, but I've never actually driven on the road. Only in the Vatican's gardens."
The chauffeur thinks it might be a good experience for the Pope and offers, "Would you like to drive now, Your Holiness? I can teach you the rules and help you navigate."
The Pope eagerly agrees, and they switch seats. The Pope starts driving slowly at first, but soon enough, he's speeding down the highway. The chauffeur is nervous but tries to stay calm. Suddenly, they're pulled over by a police officer. The officer walks up to the window and is shocked to see it's the Pope behind the wheel.
"Your Holiness! I didn't expect to see you driving today. Are you okay, sir?"
The Pope replies, "Everything is fine, officer. I wanted to experience driving on the roads, so my chauffeur here is teaching me."
The officer turns to the chauffeur and says, "It's an honour to meet you, Your Holiness."
Confused, the Pope asks, "Why is he calling you 'Your Holiness'? I'm the Pope!"
The officer chuckles and says, "I'm sorry, Your Holiness. I assumed your chauffeur was the Pope since he was wearing the Pope hat!"
Another adventure with the Pope and his chauffeur
On another occasion, the Pope and his chauffeur are driving through the city when they get caught in a dangerous situation. A group of protesters blocks the road, and the crowd becomes angry and violent. The chauffeur tries to navigate through the crowd, but the car is suddenly surrounded and attacked. Windows are smashed, and the car is rocked back and forth. The Pope, fearing for their safety, looks at his chauffeur and asks, "What do we do now?"
The chauffeur, trying to stay calm, says, "I have an idea, Your Holiness. Quickly, put on my hat and hide down on the floor. I'll put on your Papal robes and hat. Hopefully, they'll think you're me and leave us alone."
The Pope agrees, and they quickly switch clothes. The chauffeur steps out of the car, now looking like the Pope, and addresses the crowd. "Please, my children, calm yourselves and let us pass. We are here to help and bring peace."
The crowd parts, and they continue on their way. Once they're safe, the Pope says to his chauffeur, "You know, you make a much better Pope than you do a chauffeur!"
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Pope and a bum
Antonio was an unemployed man who had been struggling to find work for months. One day, he decided to attend mass at the Vatican, hoping to find solace in his faith. He only had one nice suit, which he carefully put on for the occasion. As he sat in the pew, he noticed a bum sitting in the row in front of him, dressed in dirty, raggedy clothes.
During the processional, the Pope made his way up the aisle, acknowledging and reaching out to people along the way. To Antonio's surprise, the Pope headed straight towards him. Feeling a mix of excitement and nervousness, Antonio stood up and prepared himself for the once-in-a-lifetime encounter. However, the Pope walked right past him and stopped in front of the bum.
The Pope leaned over and whispered something into the bum's ear. The bum nodded and stood up. Together, they walked down the aisle, the Pope's arm around the bum's shoulders. As they passed by, Antonio couldn't help but feel a twinge of jealousy. He wondered what the Pope had said to the bum and why he had been chosen over him.
Later that day, Antonio saw the bum again, now dressed in clean clothes and looking well-groomed. The bum approached him and thanked him for his suit, explaining that the Pope had pulled some strings and found him a job and a place to stay. Antonio was shocked and couldn't help but feel happy for the bum, realizing that the Pope had seen the good in him and helped turn his life around.
From that day on, Antonio found solace in his faith and continued to attend mass regularly, always on the lookout for those in need and willing to lend a helping hand, just as the Pope had done.
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Frequently asked questions
The phrase is used sarcastically in response to an obvious or foolish question, to affirm something that is considered to be true.
Some variations include: "Does a bear shit in the woods?", "Is a frog's ass watertight?", and "Do one-legged ducks swim in circles?".
The earliest citation of the joke was printed in the New Jersey newspaper The Asbury Park Press in February 1959.
