Grace Thompson
Kissing is not explicitly mentioned in the Bible or the Catechism of the Catholic Church, but it is addressed in Catholic theology of sexuality, which is derived from natural law, canonical scripture, divine revelation, and sacred tradition. The Church's teachings on sexual morality and chastity provide guidelines for Catholics to evaluate their behaviour and intentions. While kissing itself is not considered a sin, it can become sinful if it leads to lustful thoughts or sexual pleasure outside of marriage. The Church encourages modesty and respect for one's partner, advising Catholics to avoid behaviours that may lead to sexual arousal or transgressions against chastity, such as making out or passionate kissing. The Church's focus is on the intention behind the act, emphasising that sexual pleasure is good within the union of spouses but should not be sought in isolation from its procreative and unitive purposes.
| Characteristics | Values |
|---|---|
| Kissing considered a sin | No biblical commandments or Catechism paragraphs specific to kissing |
| Kissing considered sexual | Kissing considered sexual if it leads to lustful pleasure or is done to experience sexual pleasure outside of marriage |
| Chastity | Chastity is purity of body and mind, and sexual pleasure is disordered when sought outside the union of spouses |
| Marriage | Sexual intercourse is considered chaste only within the context of marriage, and the marriage bond is a sign of the love between God and humanity |
| Contraception | The Catholic Church is opposed to contraception and condemns the use of artificial birth control |
| Homosexuality | Homosexual acts are considered sinful, but homosexual attractions are not |
| Modesty | Kissing considered improper when expected as a reward for a date |
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What You'll Learn
Kissing and sexual morality
Catholic theology of sexuality is based on "natural law", canonical scripture, divine revelation, and sacred tradition, interpreted by the Church's magisterium. Sexual morality evaluates sexual behaviour according to standards set by Catholic moral theology, which emphasises the unitive and procreative purposes of sexual intercourse within marriage. The Catechism of the Catholic Church states that conjugal love "aims at a deeply personal unity, a unity that, beyond union in one flesh, leads to forming one heart and soul".
When discussing chastity, the Catechism identifies several transgressions, including adultery, which is considered an injustice and a violation of the marriage covenant. The Church forbids fornication, or sexual intercourse between unmarried individuals, as a "grave matter". The Catechism also addresses homosexuality, distinguishing between attractions, which are not sinful, and homosexual acts, which are considered sinful and contrary to natural law.
Within this framework, kissing can be evaluated in terms of its intention and impact on sexual arousal. While brief kisses are generally considered acceptable, "making out" or passionate kissing can lead to sexual arousal and is often considered off-limits for unmarried couples. Some Catholics choose to avoid kisses on the mouth until marriage, opting for kisses on the cheek or forehead instead.
The key consideration is whether kissing leads to lustful pleasure outside of marriage. Consenting to lustful pleasure is considered sinful, and kisses or touches that intentionally induce sexual pleasure outside of marriage are deemed inappropriate. It is up to individuals to discern whether their actions, including kissing, are driven by lustful intentions.
In conclusion, while kissing itself may not be specifically addressed in Catholic Catechism, it is important to consider it within the broader context of sexual morality. Kissing can be acceptable within the boundaries of chastity and respect for the sacredness of marriage, but it becomes morally dangerous when it leads to lustful thoughts or behaviours outside of the marital context.
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Kissing and lust
The Church teaches that sexual pleasure is good and ordered towards procreation within the marital union of spouses. However, seeking sexual pleasure outside of marriage, including through kissing and touching, is considered sinful. This is because such acts can arouse lustful thoughts and desires, which are seen as transgressions against chastity.
The Church does not provide precise rules on kissing for Catholics, leaving it to individuals to discern whether their actions tempt themselves or others into lust. Brief kisses are generally considered acceptable, while making out or passionate kissing is often seen as arousing and should be avoided. Some Catholics choose to refrain from kissing on the mouth until marriage, expressing affection through kisses on the cheek or forehead instead.
The concept of "incomplete sexual acts" is also relevant to the discussion of kissing and lust. These acts, including passionate kissing, can lead to a state of arousal and foreplay, which, if interrupted without a grave reason, may be considered venially sinful. Catholics are advised to clearly communicate their intentions to avoid misunderstandings and ensure modesty, as a failure to do so can be a grave sin.
In summary, kissing can be acceptable within Catholic teachings if it does not lead to lustful thoughts or desires outside of marriage. Catholics are encouraged to exercise discernment and restraint to ensure their actions align with the Church's teachings on chastity and sexual morality.
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Kissing before marriage
Some Catholics believe in refraining from kissing before marriage, suggesting that kisses can lead to a slippery slope of fornication or create an excessive emotional attachment that is a shaky foundation for a relationship. They also believe that passionate kissing or 'making out' between unmarried persons is a mortal sin, as it is an occasion of sin, stirring up passions and leading to sex.
However, others disagree, stating that brief kisses are generally acceptable, and that it is important to know whether there is 'chemistry' in a relationship. Some Catholics advocate for light pecking or kisses on the cheek or forehead, which are considered less intimate and innocuous.
Ultimately, it is up to each individual to discern whether their actions, including kissing, are lustful and intended to induce sexual pleasure outside of marriage, which is considered sinful. It is recommended to focus on maintaining a life of chastity and to discuss boundaries early in a relationship to ensure both parties are on the same page.
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The Church's position on kissing
The Catholic Church's position on kissing is not explicitly defined, and there are no biblical commandments or Catechism paragraphs that specifically address this topic. However, the Church's teachings on sexuality and chastity provide guidelines that inform the Catholic perspective on kissing.
The Church's teachings on sexuality are rooted in the belief that sexual intercourse has a twofold unitive and procreative purpose. According to the Catechism of the Catholic Church, conjugal love aims at a deeply personal unity that goes beyond physical union to form "one heart and soul." This unity is considered a reflection of the love between God and humanity. As such, the Church upholds the sanctity of marriage and considers sex within marriage as a gift from God.
Chastity, a key aspect of Catholic sexual morality, involves seeking sexual pleasure only within the union of spouses who are open to new life. Kissing, in the context of dating and courtship, is not explicitly forbidden, but it is important to maintain chastity and avoid lustful thoughts and desires. Consenting to lustful pleasure is considered sinful, and kisses or touches that arouse sexual desire outside of marriage are discouraged.
While there is no precise rule, Catholics are expected to exercise discernment in their actions, including kissing. Brief kisses are generally considered acceptable, while making out or passionate kissing is often seen as arousing and should be avoided. Some Catholics choose to set boundaries, such as limiting the number of consecutive kisses or avoiding tongue contact, to maintain chastity.
The Church emphasizes the importance of modesty and respect in relationships, discouraging behaviours that objectify or degrade individuals. Kissing should not be viewed as a payment or reward but as an expression of genuine affection. Additionally, the Church teaches that sexual acts must be both unitive and procreative, ruling out non-procreative acts as ways to avoid pregnancy.
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Kissing and foreplay
The Church does not provide a precise rule for kissing outside of marriage, but it is generally agreed that brief kisses are acceptable, while "making out" is arousing and should be avoided. Kissing and foreplay within marriage are considered morally acceptable, as long as they do not lead to non-procreative sex acts or contraception, which are ruled out as ways to avoid pregnancy.
Some Catholics choose to avoid kissing on the mouth before marriage, expressing affection through kisses on the cheek or forehead instead. Kissing and foreplay within marriage are considered incomplete sexual acts, and it is morally dangerous to engage in intense and prolonged foreplay without completing the act.
Foreplay is considered a proximate preparation for the sexual act, and it is important for spouses to verbally communicate their needs and intentions. Breaking off foreplay without a grave reason can be considered venially sinful.
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Frequently asked questions
There is no clear answer to this question in the Catholic Catechism. However, it is stated that consenting to lustful pleasure is sinful, and kisses and touches can be considered sinful if they tempt someone into lust or are done to purposely experience sexual pleasure outside of marriage.
The Catholic Church forbids sexual intercourse between two people not married to each other, deeming it "gravely contrary to the dignity of persons and of human sexuality".
Yes, the Church has historically opposed contraception, deeming it "intrinsically evil". The Church also rules out non-procreative sex acts such as mutual masturbation and anal sex.
The Catholic Church teaches that sexual intercourse has a twofold unitive and procreative purpose. Sexual pleasure within the union of spouses who are open to new life is considered good, while seeking sexual pleasure outside of this context is considered wrong.
