Sarah Mitchell
Loving others as they are is a central tenet of Catholicism. The Catechism of the Catholic Church reminds us that the most important thing about life in Christ is love. However, this is often easier said than done. Many Catholics struggle with loving others, especially those who are difficult or unlikable. Jesus himself acknowledged the difficulty of this task when he said, Love your enemies, and pray for those who persecute you. While it may be challenging, it is not impossible. Through the Holy Spirit, Catholics can learn to follow Jesus' example and transform into people who love like He did. This involves obeying His commandments and striving for holiness, rather than perfection. Ultimately, Catholics are called to love others as reflections of God's love, which is bound up in human love and sexuality, as well as the capacity for relationship and community.
| Characteristics | Values |
|---|---|
| Love for God | Love God with all your heart, soul, and mind |
| Love for God's people | Love your enemies, pray for those who persecute you, and wish them well |
| Love for self | Accept God's forgiveness and love for yourself |
| Love in marriage | Spouses should help each other become the "best version" of themselves, leading each other to heaven |
| Love in dating | Do not settle out of fear of being alone, trust in God's plan |
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What You'll Learn
Loving God and accepting His love
Prayer and Worship
Catholics are called to "pray always" and make God the centre of their lives. Prayer is an active way to unite with God and worship Him. Worship should be offered to God unconditionally and unlimitedly, and Catholics should be careful not to worship false gods or idols.
Faith and Charity
Charity is born from faith in God and is a manifestation of love for Him. Faith is an infused virtue that helps Catholics know who God is and feel His love. Through faith, Catholics believe all that God reveals and are filled with hope in His promises, leading to a deep and sustaining love for Him.
Sacrifice
At the heart of love is sacrifice, and Jesus' sacrifice on the Cross is a testament to His love for mankind. By sacrificing, Catholics put God's will first and find spiritual joy and peace, fulfilling their reason for existence.
Accepting God's Love
Catholics may struggle with accepting God's love, often due to idealised or distorted notions of what His love should feel like. It can be challenging for people to tolerate being loved, and they may need to first accept God's love before loving Him in return.
Living in Love
Living in the love of Christ involves obeying His commandments and striving to be present in the moment, even amid life's duties. It is about finding peace and joy in healthy, holy relationships and allowing God to guide one's love story.
In conclusion, loving God and accepting His love as a Catholic entails prayer, worship, faith, charity, sacrifice, and embracing His love in one's life. By doing so, Catholics can make God the centre of their lives and deepen their relationship with Him.
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Loving your neighbour and those closest to you
Loving your neighbour is a central tenet of Christianity, and it can be challenging. Jesus said to his followers: "You must love your neighbour as yourself", "Love one another, as I have loved you", and even "Love your enemies, do good to those who hate you, bless those who curse you, pray for those who mistreat you". This is a call to love unconditionally, without calculation, and without expecting any reward.
Loving your neighbour means showing care and acting for the good of others. It means paying attention to their suffering, moving towards them, and sharing their burdens. This can be challenging, especially when it comes to those closest to us, like family, neighbours, and colleagues, who can sometimes be the hardest to love.
To love your neighbour, you can start by being present and taking an interest in them. See and learn about their struggles by getting closer and paying attention. Then, start to act and help meet their needs. This could mean giving your time, resources, or simply showing mercy and kindness.
Loving those closest to you can be especially challenging because they see you at your best and your worst. True love means willing the genuine good of the other person, helping them become the "best version" of themselves, and leading them towards heaven. This can be done by encouraging their gifts and talents and helping them grow in holiness.
Remember, loving your neighbour is not about being a doormat. It's about showing sacrificial love and standing up for what is right. It can bring unexpected joy, as Mother Teresa exemplified by going to the poorest of the poor, sharing their lives, and bringing them hope.
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Understanding God's plan for human love and sexuality
God's plan for human love and sexuality is founded on the truth that God, who is love, created all people in his image—male and female—to share his love and reflect his love in their lives. This is revealed in Sacred Scripture and Sacred Tradition.
The Catechism of the Catholic Church teaches that the human body and sex are good, as God found everything he created to be "very good". Every person is created in the image of God and therefore has great dignity, including their sexuality. Sexuality is an integral part of God's design, and it is not something that exists with a purely biological purpose defined by personal preference. Instead, it is an intimate part of the person that is spiritually designed by God to unite a man and a woman as one flesh. This unity is a sign of the love between God and humanity, reflecting God's unitive and procreative purpose for sexual intercourse.
In marriage, a man and a woman are called to express their sexual love for each other and their willingness to become parents. Marriage is a guaranteed opportunity for personal growth in virtue, as spouses learn to put their sexual desires in service of their relationship and family. They are called to lead each other to holiness and encourage the use of their gifts and talents, fostering a deep peace that comes from listening to and acting with God.
Outside of marriage, sexual intercourse conflicts with God's plan for human sexuality, as it is meant to express a lifetime commitment and openness to new life. However, the Church recognizes that married couples may struggle with infertility and offers consolation and guidance to approach this challenge in a way that respects God's plan for married love.
In all relationships, Catholics are called to love like God, with faithfulness, trust, responsibility, forgiveness, mercy, and generosity. This includes loving those with same-sex attraction, who are called to fulfill God's will in their lives and unite their difficulties with the sacrifice of the Lord's Cross. Ultimately, God's plan for human love and sexuality is good news, bringing joy to families and the Church.
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Learning to love like Jesus
Loving like Jesus may seem like an unattainable goal, but it is not. Jesus himself gives us the steps to love in extraordinary ways. Loving like Jesus means loving God and obeying His commandments. It means loving others, including our family, friends, colleagues, and even strangers, with a sacrificial love.
Becoming More Mindful
Being more mindful involves being less detached and more approachable. It means being aware of the needs of others and reaching out to them. Jesus demonstrated this by washing the feet of his disciples, a task reserved for slaves. He showed us that we are to serve each other and not be afraid to show our vulnerabilities.
Becoming More Graceful
Being graceful means being less judgmental and more accepting. It involves shedding layers of resentment, anxiety, pettiness, and entitlement. Jesus taught us to love our enemies, turn the other cheek, and walk the extra mile. He showed us that perfect love casts out all fear and that we should not be afraid to let God write our love story.
Becoming More Self-Giving
Being self-giving means being less self-absorbed and more generous. It means putting the needs of others before our own and making sacrifices for them. This could involve helping to care for an elderly family member, showing kindness to a grouchy neighbor, or becoming a foster parent. By giving of ourselves, we trigger neurochemical reactions in our brains that result in a cascade of positive emotions.
Becoming More Bold
Being bold means being less fearful and more courageous. It involves stepping out of our comfort zone to love and serve others, even when it is difficult. Jesus was bold in his love, and we are called to follow his example and love others unconditionally.
Loving like Jesus is a continuous journey, and we will make mistakes along the way. But each time we fail, we can learn and grow in our ability to love. By embodying these qualities and following Jesus's example, we can transform our lives and the lives of those around us.
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Loving those you don't like
Loving someone you dislike can seem impossible. However, Jesus commands us to "love your enemies, and pray for those who persecute you". This act of love is an act of the will, and it can help us cope with the people we dislike in our lives.
Agape love is defined as truly wanting the best for the other person. This means actively wishing for their success and happiness, even if you don't like them. For example, imagine a rude and obnoxious co-worker who gossips and lies. Instead of grumbling about them, try wishing for them to change their ways and treat people better. This shift in attitude can help you stop disliking them and improve your own behaviour.
Accepting God's Love
Catholics believe that God makes the first move by loving us first. However, many Catholics make the mistake of refusing God's love, which can transform us. To truly love others, we must first allow ourselves to be loved by God, accepting our flaws and letting His love flow through us. This can be challenging, as it requires us to relax and stop striving for perfection.
Loving Others Through Marriage
Finding a spouse who loves you despite your faults and weaknesses is essential in Catholicism. Marriage is seen as a virtuous friendship, where spouses lead each other towards the ultimate goal of heaven. By helping each other grow in holiness and encouraging the use of gifts and talents, spouses can navigate the dating field and find true love.
In conclusion, loving those you don't like is possible through the act of willing it, accepting God's love, and applying these principles in relationships and marriage.
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Frequently asked questions
Jesus commands us to "love your enemies, and pray for those who persecute you". This is not about liking them, but rather, it is an act of the will. Pray for them, wish them well, and treat them with kindness.
The Catholic Church teaches that God is love and that all people are created in His image. Therefore, we are all created to give and receive love and to reflect God's love in the world.
You will know you have found true love when you can be your true self with your partner, without fear of judgement or rejection. You will bring out the best in each other and help each other grow in holiness.
Jesus calls us to obey his commandments and follow his teachings. We can only truly love like Jesus through the power of the Holy Spirit, who helps and teaches us to follow Jesus' example.
