Grace Thompson
There are many misconceptions about what it means to be a holy Catholic woman. For example, you do not have to be married to a Catholic, get married young, or breastfeed your children. Holiness is not about looking pious but being selfless and aware of your shortcomings. It is about building a relationship with God and putting Him first. This can be achieved by embracing the Prayer of Mary and living a life of surrendered love.
| Characteristics | Values |
|---|---|
| Foundation | Put God first |
| Be selfless and aware of your shortcomings | |
| Do not be prideful, arrogant, or selfish | |
| Marriage | You don't have to get married |
| You don't have to marry young | |
| You don't have to marry a Catholic | |
| Motherhood | You don't have to breastfeed your kids |
| You don't have to be a stay-at-home mom | |
| You don't have to homeschool your kids | |
| Mental health | You don't have to be happy all the time |
| You don't have to be free from depression |
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What You'll Learn
There is no one way to be a holy Catholic woman
For instance, while some Catholic women may choose to marry young, others may wait or choose not to marry at all. St. Gianna Molla was 33 when she married, and she had already been practicing pediatrics for several years. Similarly, while some Catholic women may choose to homeschool their children, others may send their children to Catholic or non-religious schools. St. Zelie Martin was a businesswoman and the mother of St. Therese, one of the most powerful modern saints.
Additionally, being a holy Catholic woman does not mean you have to be married to a Catholic. St. Monica, the mother of St. Augustine of Hippo, was married to a Roman pagan. Her holiness inspired her husband to convert to Catholicism.
It is also important to remember that depression or feelings of distance from God do not make you any less of a holy Catholic woman. Many saints, like St. John of the Cross and St. Teresa of Calcutta, experienced severe depression and "dark nights of the soul."
Ultimately, there are many ways to live a holy Catholic life as a woman. It is about seeking God first and striving to be selfless and aware of your shortcomings. It is a unique journey for each individual, and there is no one-size-fits-all approach.
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You don't have to marry a Catholic
Marriage is a significant decision in a Catholic woman's life, and while it is an important sacrament in the Catholic Church, it is not mandatory for a Catholic woman to marry. There is no one-size-fits-all approach to being a holy Catholic woman. Each woman's unique situation, gifts, and passions are recognised by God, and a Catholic woman's life does not need to conform to a specific mold to be considered holy.
The freedom to choose a vocation other than marriage is an integral part of Catholic life. St. Gianna Molla, for instance, pursued a career in paediatrics and married at the age of 33, demonstrating that there is no "magical order" to marriage, career, or other aspects of life that Catholic women must follow.
Additionally, it is important to note that a Catholic woman's holiness is not dependent on her spouse's religious affiliation. Interfaith marriages can be challenging, but they do not hinder a woman's ability to live a holy Catholic life. St. Monica, the mother of St. Augustine of Hippo, was married to a Roman pagan. Despite the challenges, her holiness inspired her husband to convert to Catholicism.
In conclusion, while marriage is a significant aspect of Catholic life, it is not a prerequisite for Catholic women. Holiness can be achieved through various paths, and a woman's unique journey may include a vocation other than marriage or an interfaith marriage. The key is to seek God first and build a godly life upon Him, allowing Him to guide and shape your individual path.
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You don't have to get married young
There is no one way to be a holy Catholic woman. Marriage is not a prerequisite for holiness, and neither is youth. In fact, to be a good Catholic woman, you don't have to get married at all. You could choose a different vocation!
The saints show us that you might be a military leader, a queen, an illiterate peasant, a mother, a wife, a nun, or any number of other things and still live out your Catholic faith heroically. St. Gianna Molla, for example, was 33 years old when she got married, after practising paediatrics for several years. Her story reminds us that there is no magical order of marriage, career, etc. that Catholic women must follow.
While some people marry young and have successful, holy marriages, this is not the only option. The median age for a first marriage has shifted from the early 20s in 1980 to 28 for men and 26 for women today. There are several reasons for this shift. Firstly, delaying marriage allows individuals to explore their identity, work, and love. Those who marry later often have better career opportunities and make better choices of partners, leading to more lasting marriages. Secondly, there may be increased risks associated with delaying marriage to the end of your 20s or 30s, such as more premarital sex, premarital cohabitation, and premarital births, which are all associated with higher rates of marital instability. However, it is important to note that the impact of age on marriage success levels off around 21, with little difference for those who marry between 21 and 30.
Ultimately, the decision of when to get married is a personal one and should be made after much consideration and prayer. As a holy Catholic woman, you should seek to put God first and follow His will for your life, whether that includes marriage or not.
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You don't have to breastfeed
While there are many ideas about what it means to be a holy Catholic woman, it is important to remember that there is no one-size-fits-all definition. The saints provide us with a myriad of examples of how to live a holy life as a Catholic woman. From military leaders to queens, illiterate peasants, mothers, and nuns, there are countless ways to embody Catholic virtues.
One common misconception is that holy Catholic women must always breastfeed their children. However, this is simply not true. While breastfeeding is a beautiful and natural act, it is not a requirement for holiness or motherhood. Good moms do what is best for their families, and there is no one-size-fits-all approach to parenting. Every woman's situation, gifts, and passions are unique, and God takes these into account.
In fact, there are laws in place that specifically allow women to breastfeed in any public or private location. These laws protect mothers from discrimination and encourage them to feed their children in the manner God designed their bodies to do so. The Church's highest ecclesiastical authority, Pope Francis, has also consistently encouraged mothers to breastfeed in public and even in the Sistine Chapel. He views breastfeeding as a "language of love" and has reminded mothers that Mary, the epitome of Catholic virtue, breastfed Jesus.
However, despite the encouragement from Pope Francis and the existence of protective laws, some Catholic churches and organizations have been known to restrict breastfeeding or require mothers to cover up while doing so. This contradiction can leave mothers feeling embarrassed, stressed, or pressured to give up breastfeeding altogether. It is important to remember that shaming a mother for breastfeeding or covering up is not in line with Catholic values.
Ultimately, the decision to breastfeed or not is a personal one, and holy Catholic womanhood does not hinge on this choice. Putting God first and striving for selflessness, awareness of one's shortcomings, and virtue are more important factors in living a holy life.
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Holiness is not about looking pious but being self-less
Holiness is not about looking pious but being selfless. This is a key tenet of Catholicism, and it is important to understand that holiness is not about appearance but about one's actions and devotion to God.
In the original languages of the Catholic faith, "holiness" means being "set aside" or "consecrated", totally given over to God. This means that one must open their life to God and accept His invitation of love. This is a process of conversion, a journey towards a deepening relationship with God, which is the essence of living the Prayer of Mary.
To be a holy Catholic woman, one must strive to be selfless and aware of one's shortcomings. Pride, arrogance, and selfishness are obstacles to holiness and must be guarded against. This is not about putting on a show of piety but about genuinely seeking to live a life of virtue and follow God's plan.
There is no one way to be a holy Catholic woman. The saints provide examples of diverse lives lived out in heroic faith, from military leaders to queens, illiterate peasants, mothers, and nuns. A holy Catholic woman does not have to get married, and if she does, her spouse does not have to be Catholic. She does not have to homeschool her children or send them to Catholic school, and she does not have to be a stay-at-home mother. These are all external things that do not define a holy woman.
Instead, a holy Catholic woman puts God first and builds her life upon Him. She seeks to serve others and live a life of virtue, guided by the Church and inspired by the examples of the saints. She finds her identity in God and is transformed by His grace. This is the true path to holiness.
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Frequently asked questions
Putting God first and building your life upon Him.
In the original languages, "holiness" means being "set aside" or "consecrated", totally given over to God.
Prayer is an invitation to participate in the life of God and to find our deepest identity in Him. It is through a life of prayer and surrendered love that we become "holy".
No, there is no requirement to get married or to get married young. St. Gianna Molla, a pediatrician, married at 33, reminding us that there is no set order to marriage and career for Catholic women. You can also choose a different vocation.
No, you can be a holy Catholic woman married to a non-Catholic. St. Monica, the mother of St. Augustine of Hippo, was married to a Roman pagan.
