Joshua Bennett
If you're new to the Catholic Church or haven't been to confession in a while, you might feel unsure about how to go to confession. The process is relatively straightforward, and the priest will guide you through it. First, you should examine your conscience and be honest with yourself about your sins. Then, find out when and where confessions are held and show up. When you enter the confessional, you can greet the priest and let them know it's your first time or that you're unsure what to do. You can then confess your sins, and the priest will give you absolution. Finally, you'll be given penance to do, and your sins will be forgiven.
| Characteristics | Values |
|---|---|
| How to start | Enter the confessional room, kneel down, and wait for the priest to start the prayer. If the priest doesn't start, you can make the sign of the cross and say, "Bless me, father, for I have sinned. My last confession was X days/weeks/months/years ago. My sins are... For these and other sins I have forgotten, I am sorry, father." Alternatively, you can greet the priest first and say something like, "Good morning, Father." |
| What to say | It is recommended to write down what you want to confess beforehand, including the type of sin and the estimated number of times you committed it. |
| What if I don't know what to do/say? | It is okay to ask the priest for help. You can say something like, "Would you be able to help me through this?" |
| Where and when to go | Find out the next available Confession time and location. For example, at the University of Minnesota – Duluth, Confession is held on Sundays at 9:45 a.m. in the Kirby Ballroom and 5:15 p.m. at the Cathedral. |
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What You'll Learn
What to say when you enter the confessional
When you enter the confessional, you may greet the priest first, for example, by saying "good morning, Father". Then, you may begin your confession with the Sign of the Cross, followed by:
> Bless me, Father, for I have sinned. It has been [give weeks, months, or years] since my last confession. My sins are... For these and other sins I have forgotten, I am sorry, Father.
If you are a new Catholic and are unsure about the process, you can inform the priest about the same, and they will gladly help you.
After confessing your sins, you may say:
> This is all I can remember. I am sorry for these and all my sins that I have committed against God and my brothers and sisters.
The priest will then assign you a penance, which may be a prayer, an offering, works of mercy, service, or sacrifice.
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How to start the confession
If you are new to the Catholic faith or are unsure of how to go about confessing, it is perfectly acceptable to inform the priest of this, and they will be glad to help you. It is important to remember that the priest is trained to guide you through the process, so there is no need to worry.
- Examination of Conscience: Begin by examining your conscience and reflecting on your actions. You can ask the Holy Spirit to help you be honest with yourself during this process.
- Find a Confession Time and Location: Determine when and where the next available confession is held.
- Prepare Your Confession (Optional): If you feel it would help, you can write down what you want to confess beforehand. It may be helpful to identify the specific sins you have committed and estimate the number of times you committed each sin.
- Greet the Priest: When you arrive at the confession location, walk in and greet the priest. You can say something like, "Good morning, Father."
- Kneel and Begin the Prayer: After greeting the priest, you may kneel and wait for them to start the prayer. If the priest does not initiate the prayer, you can begin with the Sign of the Cross.
- Confess Your Sins: Start your confession by saying, "Bless me, Father, for I have sinned. My last confession was [state the duration] ago. My sins are... [list your sins]. For these and other sins I have forgotten, I am sorry, Father." Alternatively, if you forget what to say or feel lost, simply express your intention by saying, "I totally blanked. How do I start?" or "Would you be able to help me through this?"
Remember, there is no fixed rule, and priests may have different approaches. The most important thing is to take that first step and go to confession.
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What to do if you don't know what to say
If you are nervous about what to say during Catholic confession, it might help to know that there is no fixed rule about how to start. You can greet the priest first, and it is also a good idea to tell the priest if you are new to the process. Be honest and straightforward about what you have done wrong, and don't make excuses. If it helps, you can explain what happened and why.
- Begin by saying: "In the name of the Father, and of the Son, and of the Holy Spirit. Amen. Bless me, Father, for I have sinned. It's been [state the length of time] since my last confession."
- Briefly describe your 'state of life' to help the priest understand your situation, for example, "I am a student" or "I am a wife and mother."
- Confess your sins. You can be specific about the number of times you have committed a particular sin, or you can give an estimate. For example, "In the past year, I have lied to my parents on about five occasions." If you are unsure about the number, you can say something like, "It has been a year since my last confession, and I have been lying to my parents."
- If you are struggling to find the right words, you can simply say, "I am sorry for all these sins and the sins of my past life."
- The priest will then give you a penance, which is usually a prayer or an action to express your sorrow and your desire to change.
- After the priest has dismissed you, spend some time with God, thanking and praising Him for His mercy.
Remember, it is natural to feel nervous, but don't let that stop you from going to confession. The priest is there to guide you and help you through the process.
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What to do if it's your first confession
If it's your first confession, it's important to know that you can ask the priest for help. Tell them that you are a new Catholic and that you have not been trained in the process of confession. They will be happy to guide you through it.
When you enter the confessional, you can choose to remain anonymous, sitting behind a screen, or you can choose to sit face to face with the priest. The priest will greet you, possibly with a reading from Scripture, and you can begin by making the sign of the cross together. You can then say something like, "Bless me, Father, for I have sinned. It has been [state the time period] since my last confession."
Next, you should tell your sins honestly and simply to the priest. You can also discuss the circumstances and root causes of your sins and ask for advice or direction. You must confess mortal sins as best you can, and it is helpful to write them down or use an app to remember them. After you have confessed your sins, say, "I am sorry for these sins and all the sins I cannot remember."
The priest will then give you a penance, which may be a prayer, an offering, works of mercy, service, or sacrifice. This will be tailored to your personal situation and spiritual good. After this, you will be asked to make an Act of Contrition, expressing sorrow for your sins. You can use a formal prayer for this, such as:
> "Oh my God, I am sorry for my sins with all my heart. In choosing to do wrong and failing to do good, I have sinned against you whom I should love above all things. I firmly intend, with your help, to do penance, to sin no more, and to avoid whatever leads me to sin. Our Savior Jesus Christ suffered and died for us. In His name, my God, have mercy. Amen."
Finally, the priest will conclude with a prayer and the words, "Go in peace," to which you respond, "Thanks be to God."
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What to do after confession
After the priest has absolved you of your sins, there are a few more steps to complete the confession. First, as the prayer of absolution comes to an end, make the sign of the cross and respond with "Amen". The priest will then offer some words of praise and blessing. You can then exit the confessional and, if you wish, pray in the church.
Outside of the confessional, it is important to remember that confession is not just about the words spoken during the ritual. It is about a change of heart and a commitment to avoiding sin in the future. This is a lifelong process and part of the ongoing journey of faith.
You can also reflect on your confession and the experience as a whole. You may wish to consider what you learned about yourself and your faith, and how you can continue to grow and improve. You can also think about how you can avoid the same sins in the future.
Finally, remember that the priest will keep your confession absolutely secret for the rest of his life.
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Frequently asked questions
When you first enter the confessional booth, you may greet the priest and then kneel. The priest may begin with a prayer, or you can start with the sign of the cross and say, "Bless me, Father, for I have sinned. My last confession was X days/weeks/months/years ago. My sins are... For these and other sins I have forgotten, I am sorry, Father." Alternatively, you can simply say, "I totally blanked. How do I start?" or "Would you be able to help me through this?"
If you don't know what to say, it may help to examine your conscience and ask the Holy Spirit to help you be honest with yourself. You can also write down what you want to confess and include the estimated number of times you committed each sin. Remember, the priest is there to guide you, so you can be honest about it being your first confession.
After your confession, you should leave the "Confession space" and do your penance.
