Joshua Bennett
There are many ways to meet a Catholic spouse. Some people meet their spouses through their local church or parish, while others may meet them through Catholic dating websites or forums. Some people may also meet their spouses through mutual friends or at social events, such as parties or retreats. Others may meet their spouses at school or work, or even by chance, such as on a flight or at an opera. Some people may even convert their spouses to Catholicism after they are already married.
| Characteristics | Values |
|---|---|
| Online dating | Catholic Match, Bumble, niche dating sites |
| In-person | Opera, university, church, work, friends, family |
| Conversion | Atheist, Protestant, Lutheran |
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What You'll Learn
Online dating
While some people may prefer to meet their Catholic spouse in real life, online dating is becoming an increasingly popular way for young Catholics to meet new eligible singles. Catholic dating websites and apps, such as CatholicMatch, have helped countless couples to meet and marry.
However, it is important to remember that not everyone you might be interested in will be on a dating app, and not everyone presents their true self online. Therefore, it is important to also meet people in person. This can be done through Catholic singles' events, dances, and mixers, or by going to Mass and talking to anyone who looks single.
If you are using a dating app, Catholic psychologist Greg Bottaro suggests bringing the relationship into the real world as quickly as possible. This can be done by planning an activity together, such as kayaking. It is important to pace yourself and get to know the person on a "one date at a time" basis for up to three months before using the "boyfriend" label.
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At church
Meeting a Catholic spouse at church is a common way that many people find their partners. One person shared that they met their spouse at a young adult retreat, and they were married about a year later. Another person met their spouse at a Catholic college, where they joined a D&D group and became friends with mutual friends, some of whom were Catholic.
For those who are not already attending a Catholic church, it can be a good idea to visit neighbouring churches, although some people may feel uncomfortable doing this solely to find a potential spouse. One person who grew up in the South, where there were no Catholic churches, decided that the best way to become Catholic was to marry a Catholic person. They met their spouse when they discovered the TLM and found out that they had attended the same university.
Some people may also choose to date someone from another faith tradition and invite them to their church services. One person shared that they and their partner would attend each other's church services and then discuss theology over lunch and dinner. Their partner eventually converted to Catholicism.
While some people may be hesitant to date non-Catholics, it is possible for a non-Catholic partner to convert sincerely out of love for God and the truth of the Catholic faith. It is important to communicate from the beginning of the relationship how important the Catholic faith is to you. However, it is not advisable to issue an ultimatum, as this may not give the other person the space to follow God's lead in their own time.
In addition to meeting a spouse at church, some people have also found success through online dating, including on Catholic dating sites and more general dating apps such as Bumble.
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At a party
Meeting your future spouse at a party is a common way to find your partner. One woman met her husband at a party hosted by a Catholic women's group, while another met hers at a Catholic Forum Christmas party. You could also meet your future spouse at a local event, such as Theology on Tap, or a New Year's party hosted by Catholic Christian Outreach, which includes daily mass.
For example, one woman shared that she met her husband at a party hosted by a Catholic women's group. She wrote, “During my 20s and early 30s, I was becoming doubtful that I’d ever get married. How many rosaries or novenas could I say? I met my husband at a party hosted by a Catholic women’s group on June 9, 2012. The minute my brother introduced us, I knew this was the man God had waiting for me. We talked for hours, oblivious to those around us. Faith, family, and similar values were evident immediately (including a magical ‘spark’). Within 3 months, he proposed, and we were married less than a year later."
Another woman shared that she met her husband at a Catholic Forum Christmas party. She wrote, “When I turned 33, I converted to Catholicism. A few months later, I told my spiritual director that I realized that if the man I was to marry was not God's pick, then I wouldn't be happy, and that I'd be happier single than married to the wrong person. My spiritual director said, 'Better to be single and wish you were married, than married and wish you were single!' How true! Ironically, about a month later, I met Mr. Right. I had met some new Catholic friends who later invited me to a Catholic Forum Christmas party. I met my future husband there."
In addition to parties hosted by Catholic organizations, you can also attend local events or parties where you can meet like-minded individuals who share your values and interests. For example, one person shared that they met their fiancé(e) online and later in person at a local event called Theology on Tap. They wrote, "I also never imagined I would meet someone online. Yet that is exactly how we met! It was on Christianmingle.com... After a couple of dates, we actually parted ways for a while, before running into each other at a local event, called Theology on Tap."
Attending social gatherings, whether they are hosted by religious organizations or local communities, can increase your chances of meeting potential Catholic spouses. These events provide opportunities to connect with individuals who share your values and beliefs, and you may find that special someone with whom you feel an instant connection, as described by the women who shared their stories above.
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Through friends
Meeting people through friends is a common way to find a Catholic spouse. Friends can introduce you to people with similar interests and values, increasing your chances of finding a compatible partner. It can also be a more natural and organic way to meet someone, as you already have a shared connection.
One way to meet a Catholic spouse through friends is to attend social events and gatherings where you can meet your friends' friends. For example, one person met their spouse at a barbecue hosted by a mutual friend, while another met their spouse through a mutual friend at a research conference. You could also ask your friends to introduce you to people they think you might be interested in dating. This could be a more comfortable way to meet someone, as you already have a mutual connection and can learn more about them through your shared friends.
Another way to meet a Catholic spouse through friends is to attend events and activities organised by Catholic groups or organisations. For example, one person met their spouse through a Catholic retreat they were staffing with a friend. Many campuses have Catholic Student Associations or Newman Centres, which are great ways to meet other Catholics and make friends. You could also attend Catholic speed dating, dances, or mixers, which can be a fun and social way to meet potential spouses. These events can also act as fundraisers, which may attract people who are usually too skeptical or embarrassed to attend.
If you're struggling to meet Catholic friends, you could try joining a Bible study group, volunteering for a cause you're passionate about, or getting more involved in your parish's community life. These are all great ways to meet like-minded people and increase your chances of finding a Catholic spouse.
Lastly, don't be afraid to let your friends know that you're looking to meet someone. Many people have met their spouses after being set up by friends, whether it's through a mutual friend or a work colleague. It can be a more comfortable way to meet someone, as you already have a shared connection and can learn more about them through your friends.
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At work
Meeting your future spouse at work is a common way to find your partner. Many people spend a lot of time at work and this can be a great place to get to know someone before starting a romantic relationship. Working together can also help you understand your partner's work ethic and how they interact with others.
If you are looking to meet a Catholic spouse at work, it may be helpful to be open about your own Catholic faith with your colleagues. This could encourage someone who is also Catholic to make the first move. Alternatively, you could look for a job in a Catholic organization or institution, where you are more likely to meet a Catholic spouse. One person shared that they met their Catholic spouse at work, although they did not provide further details on how they initiated the relationship.
Another option is to attend work social events and get to know your colleagues outside of the office. This could be a more relaxed environment to meet someone and form a connection. If you are interested in a colleague, it is important to be respectful and professional while also being open to forming a relationship.
While meeting a Catholic spouse at work is possible, it is important to be cautious and aware of any workplace policies regarding relationships between colleagues. It is also crucial to respect your colleague's boundaries and consent, ensuring that any romantic advances are welcome and reciprocated.
Overall, meeting a Catholic spouse at work can be a great way to find a partner, but it is important to be mindful of potential challenges and approach any romantic advancements with care and respect.
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Frequently asked questions
I met my husband/wife at a Catholic event/retreat/forum.
We were friends for a while first. We met through a mutual friend/at work/at university.
Yes, we dated other people before we got together.
I used a Catholic dating site/app, and we met in person at a Catholic event.
